Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Trials & Tribulations

So "one-eyed, hook handed, cleric of hate", (I believe you have to call him that now by law), Abu Hamza feels that after years of preaching terrorism and incitement to violence that he didn't get a particularly fair trial. And also that those who carried out the bombing of 7/7 and 9/11 didn't help either.

No, you probably didn't Abu. Tough life isn't it.

Monday, October 30, 2006

I've become rather fed-up with the wonderful world of windows and whilst I'm still going to do odd contracts for family, friends and existing customers that I like, from now I am concentrating on just one product, (for the time being), through my new company.

Welcome to Serranda Shutters.

Feel free to leave feedback on how you think the site works. It is as always a work in progress but at least it's now online.

So Gifted

Latest government directive to screw up the world of education is that all scholls have a register of gifted and talented pupils. Fair enough.

Government says that 25% of pupils must be registered!

That should make truly gifted children feel better when the oik down the road gets into the register for being able to pick his nose simultaneously with both fingers.

And don't even get me started on the report regarding the awarding of A & As levels where commas aren't required and the use of "u" rather than "you" is acceptable.

The Good, The Bad and The Unlikely

Many of you must be waiting with baited breath to hear whether my proposed 50th Birthday party if I'm a millionaire is going ahead.

The answer is I still plan to do it. The problem is that I'm still aproximately a million short. Still, the good news is that with 6 weeks to go there are still a number of National Lottery draws left!

Happy Birthday Muffin

Happy Birthday Muffin the Mule.

So old is this tele programme that it had finished before I was born. Just.

Altogether now!

"We love Muffin, Muffin the Mule"

No sniggering at the back you boys!!!

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Handy Hint #178

If you have a conservatory or house guttering that has a flat bottom (ogee), then you can clean it easily by cutting off the bottom of a plastic milk bottle and running it along the guttering. It scoops everything up and your gutters will run clean and true once again.

Brought to you by "I've Got A Milk Bottle and I Know How To Use It"

Thursday, October 12, 2006

Taming the Terrible Tens

This afternoon Marj has to teach the class from Hell.

Year 6 are a bunch of kids who cannot sit still for more than about 5 minutes without mayhem breaking out. If they're not talking/laughing/shouting, they are hitting each other or generally larking about. It will be worse today because they has Assessments this morning and they will have been "quiet" and under control, or what passes as control for them, all morning.

Every teacher in the school dreads having them regardless of how many yuears in the job because they cannot be controlled. Because now you cannot do anything to control them.

I'm sorry, I'm going to say it, but "In My Day" it just wouldn't be tolerated.

I once got slapped on the leg with a ruler by the teacher when I was too busy talking to Malcolm Venn and didn't see her creep up on me. Can't do that now. It's common assault.

I remember the whole class having to sit with their hands on their heads for talking or with a finger to their lips to remind us not to talk. Can't do that now. That's listed under child abuse.

Really disruptive children can be sent to the headmistress who can talk to them about their behaviour. Oh wow. That really panics them.

So on the whole, this clkass will go on to senior school with no sense of discipline, achieving lower standards of literacy and numeracy than they should, and no doubt the parents will blame the teachers.

If I got into trouble at school I wouldn't go home and tell my parents, I'd only expect to get told off again by them. (I might if I thought i'd been treated unfairly). Now, kids rush home and the next thing parents are down the school complaining about little Johnny being told off cos really he's a good boy.

And the poor teachers aren't even allowed to get their own back by putting sarcastic comments on school reports. No wonder they all want to leave.