Poacher Turned Gamekeeper

Linda needs loads of brand new plastic bags to pack things in so I said I'd go to Tescos and ask them nicely for an unopened box of carriers and explain why.

I trundled down to Tescos and explained the situation. A manager came down and explained that Tescos were trying to stop their customers using too many plastic bags as it was bad for the environment.

I explained I have at 6 large black plastic sacks and three large cartons of non-recyclable plastic packaging in my garage, the majority of which comes from Tescos and that Linda won't throw it away and it is not-re-cyclable. We actually throw nothing away. If it isn't in recyclable packaging we don't buy it and we therefore are pretty much 99% green in that respect.

It didn't of course persuade him to give me the bags, but I'm buggered if I'm going to be lectured on green issues by a lackey from a company who probably contribute more to the waste packaging mountain than any other company.

As an exercise, next time you are in a supermarket. stop near the entrance and see how much floorspace there is, then how many products there are, and subsequently how much packaging there must be in there at this very moment. Then realise that quite a lot of the stuff gets replaced on a daily or less that daily basis. And that's just one store of one supermarket. I'm not preaching from the recyclers bible, I really don't care if you recycle or not, but it does give you a damn good idea why we are running out of landfill.

Rich Man, Poor Man

The other day I was in Central London and noyiced a restaurant that hd a strarter of Poor Mans Tuscan Bean Soup. This formed part of a menu that was £25 for 3 courses!

Okay, not outlandish, but it did make me laugh.

Catch Up

Noticeable once again by my absence,

Chaos reigns supreme. Eviction looms. Trying to get an obsessive compulsive to pack stuff is an uphill struggle. You and I might decide clothes, electrical items and other white goods are most important. Linda prefers packing all the empty packaging, from hand soap containers to empty vaseline tins. It adds to the stress somewhat.

Still, unless I do something to upset google at least I won't get evicted from this blog.

How Times Have Changed

Normally I am heading off for this trade fair. However, due to Marj's upcoming venture, tomorrow we travel to Harrogate to spend Sunday at
This one!!!!!

I wonder which will be the more enjoyable?

Luxury

Can there be a feeling as great as going to bed when you are really tired? Finally getting to lie down and take the weight off. Stretching out and making yourself comfy.

Bliss.

It's an unfair cop.

Yesterday, whilst waiting for a bus, a car belonging to the local constabulary came winging it's way along Brentford High Street on an emergency call. A van managed to get in it's way. The police car wasn't going particularly fast because of the amount of traffic as it weaved in and out so it didn't have to brake hard. The police obviously didn't appreciate being held up as, having lost a few precious seconds they decided they had enough time to stop and shout at the van driver before speeding off.

To my knowledge, it isn't an offence to inadvertently block the progress of an emergency vehicle. Indeed, I think it is only convention and following advice in the highway code that we let them through anyway. Am I right, or did he break the law. Of course, if he didn't, the police in that car are guilty of road rage.

I wonder if it was the same coppers who going down Boston Manor Road last wek ended up at the back of a long queue of trafic waiting for lights at some roadworks to change. How lucky then that just as they got there they received an "emergency call" that required them to put on the old flashing lights and go straight ahead past everybody. I wonder if by some miraculous chance just as they got past, the emergency call was cancelled?

Cynical? Moi?

Three months and counting

I can't remember the exact date but I'm about nine months in and just three months to go until my driving ban finishes give or take a day.

The only real headache has been that it takes so much longer to travel anywhere by public transport.

It has been much cheaper than driving though.

Tube vs Metro

During the trip to Paris we got about on the Metro.

On sunday we used 5 lines for as many journeys. Not once did we have to wait more than 3 minutes for a train. It meant that we were able to spend more time sight seeing knowing that we could predict our travelling time back to base with pretty good accuracy.

Has anybody using the tube in London ever managed to get 5 trains in a row with less than a three minute wait for each?

No, I thought not.

And it adds insult to injury that it costs a damn sight more to travel by tube than Metro.

A better class of bomber

If the 21/7 bombers were so proud to become martyrs had their bombs gone off why are they no longer proud to admit to the cause.

In the old days any self-respecting bomber would have used a trial for making political points rather than trying to get off.

Paris Texas France

Next weekend a mate is having his 50th birthday trip to Paris. I'll be visiting Sacre Couer as I've never been inside it and we might go to Versailles on the Sunday, but if we have spare time does anyone have a tip for a little known place to visit that's a real gem?

Human Rights Violation

Following on from the story last week that two escaped prisoners could not be identified by picture as it might infringe their human rights we now have a story that a youth offender who tried to commit suicide but was cut down has won about £575,000 because his human rights were violated.

Something surely has to be done about this misuse of the Human Rights Act and it is a misuse. It seems to be interpreted by everyone and his dog as a violation of right the moment you aren't allowed to do whatever you want. The problem will come that if it is used for cases such as the above, it will become harder for real cases of violation to get heard quickly, and also to be taken seriously.

A couple of points though. Firstly, if that offender had been allowed to kill himself, i.e. not cut down when they found him, then surely it would have made euthanasia legal and set a precedent. Secondly, had he died, then his family could have sued the Prison Service for negligence. A rather dangegous precedent thus set, as it means if someone tries to commit suicide, whether they are successful or not, there will be a payout.

The Upper Class on The Upper Deck

One gets used to the chavs of London letting their offspring cavort around the bus, using it as there own personal playground and running and climbing over seats, passengers, stairwells, but now even the posh kids are at it.

On the 137 earlier today a woman with a particularly refined accent had her two kids with her, one of which was laying on the window ledge of the front upstairs window between the glass and the railing. They were discussing it's upcoming birthday party which would be attended, as best I remember, by Morgan, Charles, Samantha, Gregory but I don't think there were any Waynes or Chardonnays on the guest list. Just as well the bus didn't hit something as said child wouldn't be seeing it's birthday. The stupidity of some parents is amazing.

I nearly said something but suddenly remembered I'm a tradesman and hadn't been spoken to first. Luckily I still know my place!

Hello 2007

So I'm back online you'll be pleased to hear. (cough). And probably even more pleased to hear that I don't have a list of New Year Resolutions. Except the one which is to throw out the bathroom scales which have developed a serious error of making me 4 lbs heavier than three weeks ago.

Christmas Greetings

Not sure I'll be online much now before Christmas so Happy Christmas and all that sort of stuff. May whatever you're stuffing this christmas be tender and succulent. What that might be is totally up to you.

So Here It Is, Merry 50th.

Today I have a strange disjointed feeling. Everyone keeps wishing me happy 50th birthday and I have no idea who they are talking about. Everyone knows you are old when you are 50 and I am still nobbut a lad.

Something is was afoot.

I knew Marj had planned something for last Saturday as an early suprise for my birthday. BY the wednesday I knew we were getting up early and going to Waterloo. I knew others were involved at some point.

What happened was, we went to Waterloo and got ready to catch the Eurostar to Lille, both a town and a mode of transport I have not sampled before. Then one by one, various friends turned up until we reached Lille where another two were waiting.

I thought what might happen was me and Marj go out for the day and then when we got back people might be in a pub waiting. The fact that people were willing to go to another country to celebrate my birthday at what would not be an inconsiderable expense to them has actually quite moved me. But I'm British. So I won't let them know.

And if you haven't been to Lille it's a really nice place. I'll definitely go back for a longer visit but at the moment it is heaving with poeople visiting the Christmas Market. And, I don't wish to worry any of you single gentlemen out there, but there are a couple of wedding dress shops that the girls in our party were drooling about, particularly at the incredibly reasonable prices being charged.

...when a man has to do.....

Well I did it.

I am now the proud owner of a Mahalo Ukelele, with a hard case and plectrum.

I also indulged as it was sensible in a teach yourself ukelele book plus George Formbys greatest hits book. I already do a passable version of "With My Little Ukelele In My Hand".

I can't begin tell you how pleased Marj is!

There's a certain time in a mans life....

As the countdown to my 50th moves relentlessly forward, just 14 days to go, I have decided that there is something I must do. I have felt it for some time and feel now is the appropriate age to fulfill this longing. So in the next few days, maybe even in a matter of hours, I will be buying a ukelele.

Why, I cannot tell, but I feel it's something that befits a man of 50 to sit in the evening and have a quick strum.

I wonder if my mother was frightened by George Formby when she was a girl. That might explain it.

Feud for thought.

Whilst in Turkey, the Pope is meeting Bartholomew I, the leader of the 300million Orthodox Christians. The aim is to try to build bridges following the split of the two churches in 1054AD.

It's taken 952 years to start talking?

Steady lads, lets go slowly on these talks, no point in rushing into anything.

When is a female not a female?

Last week Georgio Armani added his name to the calls for the ending of size zero models. He has stated that he will be usaing models that are more in keeping with normal women. They will be feminine, whihc he explains means "little breast and straight hips".

Sorry? Am I the only person left who think women should have some shape. Marj is much more "Renoir" than size zero and I'm glad of it. What he is describing is still waif-like, gamine, but mainly "masculine" or boyish.

And surely hereby lies the problem. I din't think it is too stereotypical to say that a great number of male fashion designers are gay. Therefore, is it any wonder that their ideal female model is more male than female, even if in a pretty way.

The average size woman in Britain is size 16 supposedly, therefore, when they all start patting themselves on the back for using size 10 and even 12 models they still are pandering to the minority.

Give me a real woman any day.