I've just won a contract with a housing association. I was looking at their website and in the last year they have built 800 affordable houses and 100 non-affordable houses!
Non-affordable? They must be £45million per sq inch or something otherwise The Sultan of Brunei could technically afford it.
I know what they mean but to anyone who doesn't understand government speak they must wonder why any builder builds houses no-one can afford to buy.
Friday, January 30, 2009
Tuesday, January 06, 2009
CPS
Yesterday, we had one of the many legal cases that are surrounding us, and to which I keep alluding. This one was specifically about a threatening message one of Marjs daughters received as part of this series of events. It had been sent through Facebook so the charge was one of "Sending A Message by Electronic Means in Order to Cause Distress or Anxiety".
Firstly, we did win, but considering the CPS had taken on the case and were prosecuting the perputrator, they actually came to court without a hardcopy of the message or the actul correct wording. Luckily, or actually by good planning, we had all our paperwork with us and were therefore able, to the Distric Judges relief, able to supply the neccessary evidence.
How do the CPS get themselves in a situation where they go into court without the evidence? If I was "The Crown", I should want to know!
Firstly, we did win, but considering the CPS had taken on the case and were prosecuting the perputrator, they actually came to court without a hardcopy of the message or the actul correct wording. Luckily, or actually by good planning, we had all our paperwork with us and were therefore able, to the Distric Judges relief, able to supply the neccessary evidence.
How do the CPS get themselves in a situation where they go into court without the evidence? If I was "The Crown", I should want to know!
Monday, December 29, 2008
January Jaunt
Tomorrow morning, whilst it's still dark, I'm heading for St Pancras and the Eurostar to Brussels, then onwards to Bruges for three days of revelry.
Chocolate and Stella Artois will probably high on the list of purchases!
Enjoy whatever you do to herald in 2009.
Chocolate and Stella Artois will probably high on the list of purchases!
Enjoy whatever you do to herald in 2009.
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Marketing - Men & Women
At present, Marj has a new morning routine.
Get up - brush hair - put "hair putty"? into hair to give it that "just got up" look.
Mine.
Get up - Don't brush hair.
We both achieve the same result but I don't spend copious amounts of money on product.
Of course, if it came with buttons to press and flashing lights I probably would.
Get up - brush hair - put "hair putty"? into hair to give it that "just got up" look.
Mine.
Get up - Don't brush hair.
We both achieve the same result but I don't spend copious amounts of money on product.
Of course, if it came with buttons to press and flashing lights I probably would.
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Open All Hours
Saw a great leaflet for a Take-away food place today.
Open 8pm till 4am, 24/7!
Nope, that would be 8/7 but top marks for trying.
Open 8pm till 4am, 24/7!
Nope, that would be 8/7 but top marks for trying.
Watching the Detectives.
I may have mantioned before that I'm somewhat in agreement with Jeremy Clarkson that if you have been burgled, the police can't get you for any motoring offences until they've solved your crime first. If only!
Certainly in London, and I suspect most other places in the UK, if you get burgled you can forget any idea of the perputrators being caught. Last time we were burgled they took Marjs' car. After 6 months the police had failed to find it, despite the fact it was sat on a public road unmoving since the day it was taken. It was eventually discovered by The DVLA 48 hours after the tax ran out which explains a great deal about the art of "detection" around here these days.
Once upon a time the glamorous "copper" was The Detective. He would be faced with a crime and would gnaw away at the details until, using little more that his "Coppers Nose" and the odd hunch, he would track down and arrest the guilty party. Now, I suspect, little real Detection goes on. I still can't go into details about a case we're involved with as it is still sub-judice, but I can tell you that at the original incident, Police failed to find any witnesses whereas we were able to give them 6 seperate names and adresses within 48 hours by going out and asking a few questions. I wonder how Sherlock Holmes would have operated these days......
WATSON: So Holmes, what crime did you solve today.
HOLMES: Ah, My dear Watson, I like to think of it as The Sound of The Baskervilles.
WATSON: Why, what do you mean?
HOLMES: I was walking along to my local opium den when I spotted a road with, and be prepared for a terrible shock Watson, no speed camera for almost 400 yeards!
(Watson screams, and lies down upon the chaise longue with an attack of the vapours.)
HOLMES: Almost immediately I recognised the engine sound of a 1996 Ford Orion with the note pitched perfectly on D#. As you may well know, at 30 mph the engine should have been no higher than C#! I immediately threw myself in front of the car which, upon it's finally stopping some 15 feet after it had run me over, I bound to the drivers door and arrested it's owner, a Mr J Baskerville, for driving at 34mph in a 30 mph zone. I hied both myself and the miscreant straight to Scotland Yard and thus another dangerous criminal has been dealt the severe punishment of 3 points on his licence and a £50 fine. Indeed Watson, fetch me my Stradivarius violin and I shall re-enact the very notation that caused me to apprehend the aformentioned felon.
WATSON: I'm sorry Holmes, during your abscence you were burgled.
HOLMES: Oh, Bugger!
Certainly in London, and I suspect most other places in the UK, if you get burgled you can forget any idea of the perputrators being caught. Last time we were burgled they took Marjs' car. After 6 months the police had failed to find it, despite the fact it was sat on a public road unmoving since the day it was taken. It was eventually discovered by The DVLA 48 hours after the tax ran out which explains a great deal about the art of "detection" around here these days.
Once upon a time the glamorous "copper" was The Detective. He would be faced with a crime and would gnaw away at the details until, using little more that his "Coppers Nose" and the odd hunch, he would track down and arrest the guilty party. Now, I suspect, little real Detection goes on. I still can't go into details about a case we're involved with as it is still sub-judice, but I can tell you that at the original incident, Police failed to find any witnesses whereas we were able to give them 6 seperate names and adresses within 48 hours by going out and asking a few questions. I wonder how Sherlock Holmes would have operated these days......
WATSON: So Holmes, what crime did you solve today.
HOLMES: Ah, My dear Watson, I like to think of it as The Sound of The Baskervilles.
WATSON: Why, what do you mean?
HOLMES: I was walking along to my local opium den when I spotted a road with, and be prepared for a terrible shock Watson, no speed camera for almost 400 yeards!
(Watson screams, and lies down upon the chaise longue with an attack of the vapours.)
HOLMES: Almost immediately I recognised the engine sound of a 1996 Ford Orion with the note pitched perfectly on D#. As you may well know, at 30 mph the engine should have been no higher than C#! I immediately threw myself in front of the car which, upon it's finally stopping some 15 feet after it had run me over, I bound to the drivers door and arrested it's owner, a Mr J Baskerville, for driving at 34mph in a 30 mph zone. I hied both myself and the miscreant straight to Scotland Yard and thus another dangerous criminal has been dealt the severe punishment of 3 points on his licence and a £50 fine. Indeed Watson, fetch me my Stradivarius violin and I shall re-enact the very notation that caused me to apprehend the aformentioned felon.
WATSON: I'm sorry Holmes, during your abscence you were burgled.
HOLMES: Oh, Bugger!
Flu-ness
I have been laid up with flu. Quite useful though as I've discovered that flu stops you worrying about other stuff as your body puts all it's energy into coughing and sweating.
Not sure how I got it though. I know of nobody else who has it or shown symptoms. In fact, the only contact with flu I have had is by listening to The Archers every day. I think I've caught flu via the airwaves.
Not sure how I got it though. I know of nobody else who has it or shown symptoms. In fact, the only contact with flu I have had is by listening to The Archers every day. I think I've caught flu via the airwaves.
Tuesday, December 09, 2008
Ivor the Engine runs out of steam.
Sad news. The death of Oliver Postgate
As a child, Ivor the Engine was a favourite programme, along with Gerry Andersons Supercar. As an adult I finally got into The Clangers. I found the spoken bit at the beginning of ech episode, musing on life on other planets rather moving.
As a child, Ivor the Engine was a favourite programme, along with Gerry Andersons Supercar. As an adult I finally got into The Clangers. I found the spoken bit at the beginning of ech episode, musing on life on other planets rather moving.
Monday, November 24, 2008
Nocturnal Greetings
I greet you, dear reader, at ten to one in the morning.
It's not that I can't sleep, I wish I was in bed this very minute, but I'm about to take a trip. To Heathrow.
Now, if this was half as good a blog as I wish it was, I would then be boarding a plane to climb to the top of Machu Pichu or whatever it's called. Instead I am going to Heathrow to pick up my dad and step-mum as they return from Cyprus where they have been enjoying temperatures between 22 and 32 degrees over the last three weeks. I think they may find the UK a little chilly at the moment!
Their plane was due 8:45 this last evening but has been getting steadily later until it's ETA is now 01:36. By the time they've trundled through customs/passport control/sheep dip, then dropped me back home, I'll not see my bed much before 3am. Better than them though as they are driving straight from here to Norfolk, so it'll be breakfast time when they reach home.
I always start my day with a reading of those blogs I cannot live without, but there'll be no need for you to rush to post tomorrow, I don't suppose I'll be reading much before mid-day.
It's not that I can't sleep, I wish I was in bed this very minute, but I'm about to take a trip. To Heathrow.
Now, if this was half as good a blog as I wish it was, I would then be boarding a plane to climb to the top of Machu Pichu or whatever it's called. Instead I am going to Heathrow to pick up my dad and step-mum as they return from Cyprus where they have been enjoying temperatures between 22 and 32 degrees over the last three weeks. I think they may find the UK a little chilly at the moment!
Their plane was due 8:45 this last evening but has been getting steadily later until it's ETA is now 01:36. By the time they've trundled through customs/passport control/sheep dip, then dropped me back home, I'll not see my bed much before 3am. Better than them though as they are driving straight from here to Norfolk, so it'll be breakfast time when they reach home.
I always start my day with a reading of those blogs I cannot live without, but there'll be no need for you to rush to post tomorrow, I don't suppose I'll be reading much before mid-day.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Let the Show Begin
Well, thst's all the rehearsing done. 5 performances over the next 4 days. Methinks I'm going to be pretty knackered by Sunday.
Just a few things to do:
Try and learn the words to Act 2
Apply make-up in a way that doesn't make me look like Julian Clary
Kepp tights pulled up so I don't look like Nora Batty
Ah, the smell of the crowd, the roar of the greasepaint!
Just a few things to do:
Try and learn the words to Act 2
Apply make-up in a way that doesn't make me look like Julian Clary
Kepp tights pulled up so I don't look like Nora Batty
Ah, the smell of the crowd, the roar of the greasepaint!
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Remembrance
Come this day annually I tend to remember my maternal grandfather who was wounded on The Somme and lived till 1965 with a metal plate in his head following a shrapnel wound and breathing difficulties after a mustard gas attack.
A relative I tend to overlook is my Great Uncle Sam on my fathers side, who didn't make it.
Thanks to The Commonwealth War Graves Commission he, and many thousand others, are resting and remembered.
And for those who don't normally read Diamond Geezer, todays post is particularly fine.
A relative I tend to overlook is my Great Uncle Sam on my fathers side, who didn't make it.
Thanks to The Commonwealth War Graves Commission he, and many thousand others, are resting and remembered.
And for those who don't normally read Diamond Geezer, todays post is particularly fine.
Thursday, November 06, 2008
Incredibly busy painting Gondoliers poles. No, I haven't moved to Venice, it's because next week I'm performing this and I've roped myself into providing props!
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Anastacia est mort
It is with regret I announce the passing of Anastacia, spinster hamster of this parish. She died yesterday in the night, which of course is our day, of unknown causes.
She is today lying in state at the family home where a short burial and commemmoration service will take place some time around 6 this evening.
The family have requested no sunflower seeds.
She is today lying in state at the family home where a short burial and commemmoration service will take place some time around 6 this evening.
The family have requested no sunflower seeds.
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Blackpool Beware
Come Friday it's the annual trip to Blackpool!
I would say, "Lock Up Your Daughters", but at my age it's more, lock up your mothers, or if you're a particularly young blogger, your Grandmothers!
I would say, "Lock Up Your Daughters", but at my age it's more, lock up your mothers, or if you're a particularly young blogger, your Grandmothers!
Better Than You
One of the things that irritates me, (OMG, not another! I hear you cry!!) is people who park where they shouldn't. But even more specifically than parking in disabled spaces or on double yellow lines.
My real bugbear is at our local Tescos. At the end of each row of parking lanes is a hatched area. This helps people move from row to row without having to be in the roadway. Nearly every day there is someone parked in one of them. And it's nearly always a Merc driver. It doesn't have to be a busy day, there are usually plenty of spaces within two rows or so, but they seem unable to use the same spaces the rest of us park in with consumate ease.
Yesterday however, they excelled themselves. Five of the hatched boxes were occupied. Two by Mercs, two by BMWs and one by a land rover. Strange that, all five cars are "upmarket". They obviously feel the need to prove they are above other mere drivers in common cars by parking in "special" spaces. Or of course, all the disabled spaces may have ben full which is where they normally head to first!
I've heard the excuse about needing more door room for getting out but most of the time you are only 5 rows from the main entrance and there are no other cars there, so even if you do think that is an excuse, it gets shot to pieces. It's just rudeness.
My real bugbear is at our local Tescos. At the end of each row of parking lanes is a hatched area. This helps people move from row to row without having to be in the roadway. Nearly every day there is someone parked in one of them. And it's nearly always a Merc driver. It doesn't have to be a busy day, there are usually plenty of spaces within two rows or so, but they seem unable to use the same spaces the rest of us park in with consumate ease.
Yesterday however, they excelled themselves. Five of the hatched boxes were occupied. Two by Mercs, two by BMWs and one by a land rover. Strange that, all five cars are "upmarket". They obviously feel the need to prove they are above other mere drivers in common cars by parking in "special" spaces. Or of course, all the disabled spaces may have ben full which is where they normally head to first!
I've heard the excuse about needing more door room for getting out but most of the time you are only 5 rows from the main entrance and there are no other cars there, so even if you do think that is an excuse, it gets shot to pieces. It's just rudeness.
Cat's In The Cradle
I hear via my stepmum that her and my father are taking a trip to Cyprus, as they do each year, but this is likely to be the last. His health is deteriorating at a reasonable pace and flights and manoverability are beginning to be a problem.
This leads me on to having to think about the los of my father, not imminently, but in a forseeable future. The loss of my mother, when it should happen, will be devastating to me. I find it hard even to contemplate such an event. But as I am sure I have blogged previously, my father and I aren't particularly close. A situation and relationship best summed up in the lyrics of Harry Chapin's song referred to in the title of this post, although I suspect that it is unfair on my father.
I can't see how I will react. I'll be sad, but then I was sad when one of my oldest friends father died. I just can't see me feeling worsed than that. I guess I'll have to wait and see.
This leads me on to having to think about the los of my father, not imminently, but in a forseeable future. The loss of my mother, when it should happen, will be devastating to me. I find it hard even to contemplate such an event. But as I am sure I have blogged previously, my father and I aren't particularly close. A situation and relationship best summed up in the lyrics of Harry Chapin's song referred to in the title of this post, although I suspect that it is unfair on my father.
I can't see how I will react. I'll be sad, but then I was sad when one of my oldest friends father died. I just can't see me feeling worsed than that. I guess I'll have to wait and see.
Sunday, October 19, 2008
C'Mon Lewis
Well, despite the sledging by his opponents, Lewis Hamilton got his 10 points for this race. Good on him. Ferrari are no doubt going to do their Man Utd act and claim how there were a number of incidents which hapened, all of which went against them. And Massa managed a wonderful second place when his team mate managed to slow down enought for him to finally catch up and overtake. And I thought team orders had been outlawed.
Lewis just has to make sure he gets pole position as I suspect if he isn't in front there will be manouvers to block him in, or even worse, someone will contrive to have a bump with him just to take him out.
Not that I'm cynical of course.
Lewis just has to make sure he gets pole position as I suspect if he isn't in front there will be manouvers to block him in, or even worse, someone will contrive to have a bump with him just to take him out.
Not that I'm cynical of course.
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Dismissal Downside
One of the worst bit's of running your own company is having to sack people, although in my case it's more just not using someone again as they are legally a sub-contractor.
I have someone who I have used a few times, is damned good at what he does, but unfortunately it would appear has light fingers.
A laptop went missing from a job he was working on. He was sort of in the frame but so were too many other people. Now news reaches me that would boost him up to 95% certain to have done it. He won't admit it of course, as he's not admitted to some other stuff on another job being down to him, which it was, bang to rights. I really don't want it to be him as I want to help him get established in his own right as he hasn't had the easiest life up until now, but he has to help himself. And not just to other peoples goods!
It's sad, and I'll have to discuss it with Marj as she is co-director, but I think the writings on the wall for him.
And as this is my blog and thus everything has to be about me, I now have to find someone else who can do the work I had lined up for him and that isn't going to be easy.
I have someone who I have used a few times, is damned good at what he does, but unfortunately it would appear has light fingers.
A laptop went missing from a job he was working on. He was sort of in the frame but so were too many other people. Now news reaches me that would boost him up to 95% certain to have done it. He won't admit it of course, as he's not admitted to some other stuff on another job being down to him, which it was, bang to rights. I really don't want it to be him as I want to help him get established in his own right as he hasn't had the easiest life up until now, but he has to help himself. And not just to other peoples goods!
It's sad, and I'll have to discuss it with Marj as she is co-director, but I think the writings on the wall for him.
And as this is my blog and thus everything has to be about me, I now have to find someone else who can do the work I had lined up for him and that isn't going to be easy.
When is a meeting not a meeting?
I was in Sainsburys this morning when there was a staff announcement....
Could all department managers go to,,,,,, for this mornings huddle.
A morning huddle?
I assume this is a meeting where everyone stands round and just gets told the orders of the day. Fair enough. But letting your customers know you are having " a huddle" just makes you sound like a bunch of idiots.
Of course, it could be worse, I might have misheard and they were all off for their morning cuddle!!!!
Could all department managers go to,,,,,, for this mornings huddle.
A morning huddle?
I assume this is a meeting where everyone stands round and just gets told the orders of the day. Fair enough. But letting your customers know you are having " a huddle" just makes you sound like a bunch of idiots.
Of course, it could be worse, I might have misheard and they were all off for their morning cuddle!!!!
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