Blogging Up The Works

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Proverbials #1 - Never Look A Gift Horse In The Mouth

The first problem was to find a gift horse. There are few horses in this neck of West London. Those that are almost definitely belong to gypsies and are best not looked at at all. This obviously required a modicum of lateral thinking and thus I took myself off to Toys'R'Us and made straight for the My Little Pony display.

Looking into the mouth of My Little Pony is a tricky business, particularly when packed in a giant bubble of plastic, the horse, not me, but then, when someone says "look into my eyes" they don't intend you to open their eyes surgically and have a rummage around amidst the contents. This being the case I stared intently at the mouth areas of several of the ponies. This was a safeguard as there was an outside chance that a young girl might come along and buy a pony for herself rather than as a gift. The chances of that happening half a dozen times in a row was slim.

I left the shop. It didn't collapse trapping me within the rubble. All was starting well. Then, things started to go even better.

My power lead for the laptop had packed up the other day and IBM wanted £100+ for a new one, and even Maplins generic model is £49.95! Straight to e-bay and someone locally was selling an IBM lead of the right type and no-one had bid. Allowing a top bid of £20 which would have been well worth it, I had the start bid of £4.95 and by 3.20 when the auction finished it was mine, still for £4.95. Spoke to the seller and we arranged to meet, and three hours later it was in my possession. Result!

But not the only result. My journey to meet him involved me coming north up the A3 and down West Hill from Tibbetts Corner. A stretch of road so notorious for traffic delays that grown men have been reduced to tears and forced to eat the innards of their car seats as sustenance as the hours ticked by to move a further 50 yards. I entered the underpass. This was promising, I came out the other side. A hold up here would be average to good. I headed for the bit where three lanes become one. Still no traffic. In fact, the first time I had to apply the brakes was halfway down West Hill at the lights with West Hill Road! Not bad for 5.30 in the evening!!!! In fact, that would have been exceptional at 5.30 in the morning as anyone acquainted with the area would know!

Other more mundane things are going well and better than normal.

Conclusion : Not only is it safe to look a gift horse in the mouth, it is positively recommended. I can only assume that the instruction to desist from this action was started by The Society for Equine Mouth Gazers to protect their good fortune.

My next challenge will commence shortly.


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